DISCLAIMER: I am not /do not claim to be sexually fluid. This is simply m take from several resources and my life experience.
A person who experiences fluid sexuality will experience changes in their sexual orientation, whether over a lifetime, years, months or sometimes weeks or days at a time.
People who identify as having fluid sexuality often see it as a distinct sexual orientation.
A person with fluid sexuality may be attracted only to men for much of their life but gradually experience a growing attraction to women.
A person may only be attracted to men for a number of months, then experience equal attraction to both genders for a period of time, then experience attraction to neither gender for a time and so on. This would be fluid sexuality.
- Urban Dictionary
A person who experiences fluid sexuality will experience changes in their sexual orientation, whether over a lifetime, years, months or sometimes weeks or days at a time.
People who identify as having fluid sexuality often see it as a distinct sexual orientation.
A person with fluid sexuality may be attracted only to men for much of their life but gradually experience a growing attraction to women.
A person may only be attracted to men for a number of months, then experience equal attraction to both genders for a period of time, then experience attraction to neither gender for a time and so on. This would be fluid sexuality.
- Urban Dictionary
According to Jarune Uwujaren a sexually fluid feminist writes is like any other type of sexuality.
For example:
· All straight people don’t wake up and decide to love in a strictly heteronormative fashion
· All lesbian don’t come to the conclusion after a night filled with alcohol and bi-curious friends
· All gay men were not abused during childhood, which led to their hate and unromantic relationships with women
Basically this is not a conscious choice, one simply does or does not like certain things (i.e. colors, sports, music).
Similar to the way some bisexuals are told “Make up your mind” or homosexuals are told “Just try it [heterosexual intercourse]”, those who are sexually fluid are given the same pressure. I’ve been pressured to “try it”, but every individual knows their personal preference. It’s all a matter of what feels right in one’s heart.
Jarune puts into a perfectly illustrates the way her sexuality works:
… my enjoyment of both pretzels and Nutella. Yes, pretzels and Nutella are two great tastes that go great together, but they don’t always have to go together. And when I’m munching a pretzel I’m not fantasizing about Nutella, and when I’m eating Nutella straight out of the jar (admit it, you’ve done it too) I don’t get the urge to add a pretzel to the mix.
Another difficulty is going against the stereotypes set by the LGBT movement’s nemesis: BARSEXUALS <https://www.google.com/search?q=what+is+a+barsexual&oq=what+is+a+barsexual&aqs=chrome..69i57.3235j0j4&sourceid=chrome&espv=210&es_sm=122&ie=UTF-8>
As a result, some have been accused of being sexually greedy or wanting to a have it all. “It” being, having a homosexual lover without claiming the gay lifestyle therefore keeping the heterosexual privilege. (Ex: no need to fight for gay marriage when you’re happy either way, right?). Callow men may not see bisexual women as greeady people, but objectify the woman while sexualizing her relationship. It doesn’t help that there are “lesbians til graduation” or songs about girls kissing girls driving women to be barsexuals. According to NYmag:
“Acceptance of bisexual women [or any woman who hasn’t “picked a side”] hinges in part on straight men's fetishization of it," says a friend of mine who has dated both men and women. "My male friends were endlessly curious about the dirty details of my same-sex relationship."
In high school, I’ve had at least one or two bold guy friends inquiring about my relations and attractions to women – IN DETAIL. Unfortunately, this isn’t the worst I’ve dealt with pertaining to my unsophisticated, heterosexual male counterparts.
Aside from thoughts and opinions from the outside looking in, there are is discrimination within the LGBT community:
In a Pew Research Center survey of LGBT Americans this summer, 33 percent said there was “a lot of social acceptance” of bisexual women; only 8 percent said the same of bisexual men.
Like the self-proclaimed asexuals, genderqueer of the LGBT family, there can be a conflict of interest. One thing heard much too often is
“You’ll grow out of it”
”It’s just a phase”
Many young people have told their parents:
“I’m ______! It’s not a phase!”
It’s hard to fight for the right to be openly gay — to argue that homosexuality is not a phase or a choice — while simultaneously acknowledging the people whose experiences defy easy categorization.
This could make the movement more difficult for other members of the community, but they don’t have to be excluded. (Adding the “T” was – maybe it still is – looked at as slowing the progress, but I feel people are gradually moving past that).
In fluid sexuality it’s an unpredictable cycle that one is well aware of.
As for my sexuality personally, I love woman on all levels. Some friends have said: “Is he cute?” Then quickly stopped themselves to say “Oh yeah, you like women” I DO find certain men attractive, which means I do have ”a type”. I’ve actually helped a good friend on a “man hunt” multiple times. WING(WO)MAN. Anything beyond a friendship, no matter how attractive he may be, is out of the question; I cannot date, be romantic or participate in intercourse voluntarily and be happy about my choice. As I grew up, I tried to explore this interest in the male homo sapien <damn you society and your status quo> To sum it up, it did not work out for me or him. While I was researching the topic I saw a surprising study:
Research on women’s sexual desires (as opposed to their behavior) reveals the female libido to be, in the words of author Daniel Bergner, “omnivorous.” When researcher Meredith Chivers showed women clips of erotica — women with women, men with men, men with women, lone men or women masturbating, a pair of fornicating apes — everything made their vaginas pulse. There were some variations between straight women and lesbians, and among women of all sexual identities. But while women may not admit it to researchers or even acknowledge it to themselves, we’re basically turned on by everything.
I’ll leave you with that for now, but we will definitely discuss this in the near future!
Because I’m not sexually fluid, I will leave with a few resources I‘ve stumbled upon this past week:
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/fundi-fe/2014/02/07/human-sexuality-in-2014
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-sexually-fluid-persons-guide-to-a-seamlessly-uneventful-coming-out
Jarune Uwujaren http://everydayfeminism.com/author/jaruneu/
House of Lies – explores a bit of sexually fluid characters http://www.afterellen.com/sexuality-and-gender-are-fluid-in-house-of-lies/01/2014/
A subversive, scathing look at a self-loathing management consultant from a top-tier firm. Marty, a highly successful, cutthroat consultant is never above using any means (or anyone) necessary to get his clients the information they want. – IMDb
On Netflix DVD and Showtime
If you like comics, word on the street: Loki is bisexual/pansexual/fluid?!
- tRANSsEXUAL Whoa-man Lover